If you’re on a first date and you’re trying to figure out
what Mr. or Ms. Potentially Right thinks about you, look
Not there, silly.
“The key to a man’s
heart isn’t his stomach. It’s his feet,” says Lisa Daily, author
of “Stop Getting Dumped!” (Subtitle: “All You Need to Know to
Make Men Fall Madly in Love With You and Marry ‘The One’ in 3
Years or Less.”)
As it turns out, the foot rule also
applies to women.
"also if you hold there hand they will be
more engaged in you. Works for me!"
Have your say
“Watch the feet of the person you’re
attracted to,” she tips AdamandDrew.com. “People who are
attracted to each other subconsciously try to ‘line up’ with the
other person. Where the toes point, the heart follows.”
When you take the Sherlock Holmes approach to reading your date,
trying to sleuth out whether he/she thinks you’re hot (or not),
body language is the smoking gun, my dear Watson.
if we’ve got our game faces on, the body doesn’t lie,” Daily
In fact, studies reveal that only 7% of our
communication is verbal, according to Mari Smith, a relationship
coach based in San Diego, California. The other 93% is
Tips & Clues
Men send out the following
tips when they’re interested in you, according to Daily and
- Extended eye contact.
Grooming behaviors (straightening their ties, pulling up their
- Upright stance or posture.
- Standing with their
chests thrust outward and shoulders back (think of a giant
- Ego-driven comments about their
successes in life (jobs, cash, their cars).
“He may have
one hand in his pocket, with his thumb sticking out, or tuck his
thumbs in his belt,” Smith adds.
As for the so-called
“fairer” sex, look for the following nonverbal cues from a
- Extended eye contact and smiling (just like
- Leaning inward or toward you.
- Exposing her neck,
hands or palms.
- Flipping her hair (with her hands or a
twist of the head) or twirling it playfully.
- Crossing and
uncrossing her legs.
- Fondling cylindrical objects like the
stem of a wine glass, straw, pen or cigarette. (Paging Dr.
“Houston, We Have a Problem”
sexes, there are also signs that things are not going well,”
says Daily, who notes that distasteful dates, traumatic breakups
and consequent crisis periods often call for “a few Nora Ephron
movies and two tubes of frozen cookie dough eaten right out of
Look for speech patterns that are wildly
out of sync. “He’s a slow talker, while she’s a
thousand-words-a-minute,” she says.
language—arms crossed in front of the chest or hands
subconsciously protecting the groin area.
keeps looking over your shoulder while you speak.
someone is not interested in you, they will typically point
their body and feet away from you and position themselves at a
greater distance,” Smith adds.
Saying Goodnight…or Saying
As your date winds down, other cues foreshadow
your relationship’s future.
“If you give your date a hug
on the doorstep and he or she pats you on the back, it’s a sign
of discomfort,” Daily says. “The more uncomfortable your date
feels, the bigger the pat. The other obvious, not-so-great sign
is going in for the doorstep kiss—and getting a handshake
Positive signals are much easier to
read: a concrete invitation for a second date, with firm
plans—not just “let’s do this again” or “I’ll call you
sometime,” Daily says.
The Flirt Factor
with your date—and being on the receiving end—meets Sherlock’s
criteria for irrefutable evidence that your lovely evening may
evolve into a bona fide relationship.
Daily takes it one
step further, asserting that flirting is “absolutely necessary.”
“Flirting is how we communicate our interest—and how we connect
emotionally before we connect physically,” she says. “Generally,
flirting is harmless, but it can sometimes be interpreted
incorrectly by the ‘flirtee.’ The key is to pay attention to the
tone of the flirtation and wait to see how the flirter responds
if you try to take it up a notch. If she backs down, she was
probably just flirting for fun. If she escalates the flirting in
turn, she’s communicating interest.”
“Use attitude, voice
and body synchronization to make others feel like they have a
special rapport with you,” advises Nicholas Boothman, a
communication specialist and author of “ How to Make Someone
Love You Forever in 90 Minutes or Less.” He encourages those he
counsels to learn to “access—and rev up—your sex appeal, without
going over the top.”
by mirroring your partner’s physical presence and verbal
“When you synchronize your overall body
language, your tone, the speed and volume of your voice, and
even the type of words you use—as well as your attitude—people
feel safe, familiar and trusting with you,” he tells
Smith believes women have the edge—and a
lot more fun—when it comes to flirting. (Sorry, guys…)
“Playful, lighthearted behavior is really the domain of women,”
she says, “and typically men love it and gravitate toward the
woman who looks the most fun. It certainly pays to familiarize
yourself with all of the signs of attraction so you know how and
when to communicate interest—and make sure you’re sending the
About the Author:
Joe Markus-Adam and Drew's Dating Tips is visited by thousands
of single people each and evrey week looking for tips they can
use when out on a date. By working with a variety of experts in
the dating, flirting, body language, relationship and online
dating fields, AdamandDrew.com as managed to create a wealth of
interesting, readable content.
also if you hold there hand they will be more
engaged in you. Works for me!
when i'm with my boyfriend, he always smiles, and
looks into my eyes. he's the one.
when you lads are talking to girls look at our eyes
not our mouths. Listen to what we say instead of
imagining kissing us so when we ask you a question
you have something better to say than ''nice lips''
True, True & True. Girls like calm guys, ones who
don't rush in, not ones who are too quick and
All this information is true because I've been doing
this for a while now. Just don't turn into a
'player' guys, it's not nice for girls and it gets
Ace. Have to say some of these
things I never thought about, but when I hear them,
I absolutely agree with them.